i hate the neologism “partner” for “person i’m dating”. i have no intention of being a cowboy and nobody will ever be a cowboy to me.
speak for yourself, slim. some of us cowpoke are lookin’ for the right partner to call our own… [twangs acoustic guitar softly as i stare towards the twinkling night sky] don’t see many of them stars where you’re from, eh, city boy? nah. didn’t think so.
With great plaid comes great responsibility
what is wrong with everyone
i think the best feeling is when you make someone that you like a lot laugh and their face lights up and they start giggling and you’re really happy that you were able to make someone so beautiful smile so much
christmas is so much worse as you get older it’s like “what do you want this year?” “a sense of purpose”
I M LISTENING TO THE SANTA BABY COVER BY MICHAEL BUBLE AND HE FUCKING
CHANGED THE LYRICS TO “SANTA BUDDY”
IM LAUGHIGN SO HARD
NO HOMO SANTA
A lobster is smarter than me.
that’s a mantis shrimp
and it is definitely smarter than me
It’s because of how they see color. It was probably super obnoxious to them how the colors didn’t match up.
fucking shrimps i stg
What. The. Fuck.
and THEN we go back to spainAND LIVE LIKE KINGS!
do we panic now
that’s what we call a character developing feelings
LOOK AT THE FUCKING TEARS IN HIS EYES IN THE SECOND GIF
I feel like Robert Pattinson auditioned for Twilight as a joke and then when he got the part he decided it would be funny to take the joke even farther and now he hates himself for doing it.
[im a boss ass bitch plays quietly in the background]